I caught the Headmaster lookin' at websites tonight that claim they sell products to remove 'tear stains" from dogs.  I don't know what are tear stains, but I do know that I don't like it when he rubs stuff on my face.  I can't really tell any difference, but I think the idea is that it will remove the warpaint I put on to look cool and tough.  I mean, really, come on, why can people do makeup and tattoos and all that, and I can't even get away with a little red paint on my face.  I tell you, it just isn't right.